Damaged love vs Deserved love

What keeps the love going?  I’m not sure I’m still figuring it out. There’s so much to learn about having a partner in life. From my experiences, I’ve had nothing but serious relationships and so far they all failed to show me what love truly is. However, they succeeded to show me what love isn’t and that’s why I don’t regret any of them.

I even had a boyfriend that was about to lay his hands on me just as he accuse me of having an affair. It’s crazy what insecurity can do to a person. Or maybe it was just the fact that he was a jerk after all. At that moment I laughed, thinking he was joking and that’s when I realized his arm go up. Note, I grew up having four older brothers so I know how to fight, plus I used to box. I automatically told him, “try me!” Then I went on to remind him that if he ever had mistreated me, it’ll be the first and last time. So that was the end of another long relationship.

Right after that I called my father and he told me to come home. At that time I was miles away. It’s interesting my father showed me a lot of good things in my life including  what I don’t want as a husband and what I want as a father. I will never want what my mother had. I promised myself when I was a little girl that no man will ever break me. I promised myself I will never let a man use me. I don’t wish people any harm, but I believe in karma.

So even when it feels like it’s the end of the world. Even when you know you made the right choice to walk away. Know you will be more than OK.

Life goes on. We must respect and love ourself and make sure your partner loves and truly respects you the same. Don’t waste your time on someone that doesn’t. We all deserve to be loved so here I go trusting God, life, and the universe one day at a time.